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  #17226  
Old 11-10-2017, 09:50 AM
Noitora Noitora is offline

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Haven’t logged into battle net for a while and I just had a small panic attack forgetting my password.
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  #17227  
Old 11-10-2017, 11:46 AM
Shekinah Shekinah is offline

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Originally Posted by Noitora View Post
Haven’t logged into battle net for a while and I just had a small panic attack forgetting my password.
Been there. I also need to get a new authenticator, but I don't want to spend four hours on the phone waiting for customer service.
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  #17228  
Old 11-11-2017, 06:03 AM
Morvant Morvant is offline

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Last days have been feeling like I was waking up from a years long nightmare. Kinda like a long lonely fall in the dark. And then , surprise ! It was real ! Also you are going to hit a bunch of rocks approximately ... now.

Worlds of hurt.

Funny how internal screaming is an actual thing. It's been going on for a few days now.

Went to see a new doctor.

So bendodiazepin withdrawal is a thing apparently. A violent one. I gradually stopped part of my meds a few weeks ago. Which is probably tied to the current state of affair.

I should have done that years ago though. I think I prefer hurting and being aware of it than sleeping it through for ever.
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  #17229  
Old 11-11-2017, 07:08 AM
Shekinah Shekinah is offline

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Bendodiazepin withdrawal even has its own Wikipedia page. Makes me wonder why it's diagnosed in the first place if it's so damned dangerous.
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  #17230  
Old 11-11-2017, 08:18 AM
Kellick Kellick is offline

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Originally Posted by Noitora View Post
Haven’t logged into battle net for a while and I just had a small panic attack forgetting my password.
Hah! Been there. I've been using that old password for years now (and probably should get around to changing it, but I've not gotten into that good habit), and sometimes I freeze on that screen.

Also, it's Remembrance Day and/or Veteran's Day in several countries around the world today, so don't forget to pay your respects to your veterans, and try to head out to a ceremony if you can. I realize this message comes a few hours late for our european friends, but it's still early on this side of the atlantic.

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  #17231  
Old 11-11-2017, 08:51 AM
Morvant Morvant is offline

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Originally Posted by Shekinah View Post
Bendodiazepin withdrawal even has its own Wikipedia page. Makes me wonder why it's diagnosed in the first place if it's so damned dangerous.
It's fucking efficient, that might be why.

It's hard to describe the state I was in before I started taking it. It was awful. A cacophony of thoughts. And not good ones. Mind splitting awful. I want to die just so it can stop level of awful. It wasn't just psychological, my body was starting to fuck up too. Weird tingling in the chest that feels like your heart is going to give up, muscle pain everywhere, and the entire digestive system who goes in IBS overdrive mode.

It went away in a matter of a night. Took my pills, went to sleep, and when I woke up my mind was a lot more ... quiet ? And pain free.

That was heaven.

From there on the concept of stopping it was scary to say the least.

But it seems pretty clear now that it doesn't just blunt the pain. It blunts the mind too. I really should have stopped sooner. What a fucking idiot. What a fucking coward. I knew I was just delaying thing, but I was too scared to stop. What a fucking waste.

( I couldn't even chose a cool drug to get addicted to. Lame. Should have got onto alcohol, tobacco and weed like everybody else, at least I would have socialized a bit )

( also I am reading the american addiction center page on bendodiazepin, and now I want to punch the fuckwit who told me stop like I did and gave me my next appointment a month later )

Last edited by Morvant; 11-11-2017 at 08:54 AM..
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  #17232  
Old 11-11-2017, 09:29 AM
Shekinah Shekinah is offline

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You can always call if things get out of control for you, but if you don't trust your doctor (I've been there, trust me), then I don't really know how to help... maybe if you complain enough, they can see you sooner?

There's also the hospital, but that's costly.
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  #17233  
Old 11-11-2017, 09:08 PM
Morvant Morvant is offline

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Thank you. I appreciate that very much .

I think I am good for the time being. The generalist I saw yesterday gave me something to patch things up in the meantime and will see me again next week. Not a psychiatrist, but at that point I am not sure that he would be less competent.

And I am lucky enough to live in a country where there are free public mental health centres ( though they are clearly over saturated and understaffed ), and where seeing a private doctor cost very little.

But yeah, finding a doctor I can trust and that doesn't prescribes me 5 new drugs after talking with me for 5 minutes before kicking me out, that's another problem.
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  #17234  
Old 11-11-2017, 10:01 PM
Shekinah Shekinah is offline

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Prescribing meds is how they make their money. It would help immensely if they could just talk for more then five minutes about your health, your life, your issues, but no, it's all about the medicine. Pity that psychiatrists are like this no matter the country.
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  #17235  
Old 11-12-2017, 02:34 PM
Morvant Morvant is offline

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Problem is the same in the public service, and they don't make money on a per consultation basis. Their problem seem to be that over the past 5 years the number of patients have been increasing and the number of actual psychiatrist has been going down.

Which I guess is still tied somewhat to money.

But from the number of different psychiatrists I have seen, more or less regularly, in different places, they all seem to have a pretty strong reliance on meds. I think that's the current "zeitgeist" in psychiatry. Which is probably not helped by how uncomfortable every body is about talking. The patients firsts of all I suppose. Let's take the magic pill and not talk about it. Everything should be fine.

Thank god for psychiatric nurses who can't make prescription and actually take time to make you talk.
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  #17236  
Old 11-15-2017, 05:59 AM
Commander Rotal Commander Rotal is offline

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My heel-bootlets arrived after three weeks of waiting and two trips to the post office because the package was filed incorrectly (by the post, the seller did nothing wrong). But who cares, they're here now. Here, and waaaay cheap. Like, i've been wearing them less than two hours and the right one's heel is already getting wonky. Still, i only ordered them to try heeled shoes, they were fairly cheap and i didn't expect much in terms of quality. I'd LOVE to try them out in a shoe shop, embarrasing or not, but try as i might i literally could not find any heeled shoes above EU size 43. And i'll need something in the range of 46 because my feet are wide; i ordered 46, they sent 47, and they feel like 45s. I fit in beautifully, except the bottom is hilariously small - i didn't realize at the time that i was buying from a chinese seller, so that kind of makes sense. But, y'know, they fit, they haven't broken juuuust yet, i enjoy the look, the walking is growing on me, except i have trouble trusting the right heel, therefore trouble with putting my weight on it, and the bottom being too small is actually hurting my feet more with the outline cutting into my feet than the weight on my toes hurts, the latter of which is actually fairly manageable for the first time ever wearing heels.
So.... all in all, i'm relatively happy, i just wish i didn't have to expect them to break before the day is over. I mean, shit, i can smell AND see the glue; next time, pick one, guys...

I guess all that's left is waiting for that sweet holiday salary and forking over 200 bucks for 46s that actually wide enough for me, and of high enough quality to not play russian roulette everytime i forget not to put my entire weight on that right heel.

Unrelated: apparently parfume is just fancy deodorant? I never knew. Need to investigate.
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  #17237  
Old 11-17-2017, 03:30 AM
Krainz Krainz is offline

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SIXTY FUCKING PAGES WRITTEN OVER THE COURSE OF FOUR DAYS

AAAAAAAYYYY WE GO BOISSSSSSSSSS

now I need something very immersive to drown myself into

just so I can relax

Any absorbing narrative? Game? Series?
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  #17238  
Old 11-17-2017, 04:32 AM
Aneurysm Aneurysm is offline

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now I need something very immersive to drown myself into

just so I can relax

Any absorbing narrative? Game? Series?
Do all the drugs!
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  #17239  
Old 11-17-2017, 06:30 AM
Noitora Noitora is offline

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Quote:
Originally Posted by Aneurysm View Post
Do all the drugs!
I’m honestly shocked that you haven’t od’d yet.
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I looked into Blizzard's heart and saw only retcons.
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The continuing existence of Five Night's at Freddies is proof that there is no God.
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SoL: 20 something know it alls telling other 20 something know it alls they know everything.
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  #17240  
Old 11-17-2017, 09:12 PM
Leviathon Leviathon is offline

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So a big name retail corporation decided it was a good idea to push an update to their routers the week before Black Friday and not test their configuration first. Now they have over 700 stores that need their routers re-imaged and expect the company I work for to get that all done by Thursday.
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  #17241  
Old 11-17-2017, 09:56 PM
Ruinshin Ruinshin is offline

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Quote:
Originally Posted by Leviathon View Post
So a big name retail corporation decided it was a good idea to push an update to their routers the week before Black Friday and not test their configuration first. Now they have over 700 stores that need their routers re-imaged and expect the company I work for to get that all done by Thursday.
How bad is the configuration? Can the routers still be hit remotely? That could be really easy or really not.

I'm going to guess not.
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  #17242  
Old Yesterday, 02:35 AM
Gurzog Gurzog is offline

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should have worked today, but i am sick atm, and couldnt call due to phone being buggy (even tried restarting, didnt work) and due to that well i couldnt do much about it, But I am probably going to quit, but if they ask i will probably just say the truth.
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  #17243  
Old Yesterday, 02:53 AM
Aneurysm Aneurysm is offline

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Originally Posted by Gurzog View Post
should have worked today, but i am sick atm
I thought you said you missed the bus/train or whatever, ended up going to the wrong place entirely, and then decided to call in sick for running some three hours late. Is that what being sick nowadays is?
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  #17244  
Old Yesterday, 03:48 AM
Gurzog Gurzog is offline

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Quote:
Originally Posted by Aneurysm View Post
I thought you said you missed the bus/train or whatever, ended up going to the wrong place entirely, and then decided to call in sick for running some three hours late. Is that what being sick nowadays is?
Was abit to fast pressing reply.
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  #17245  
Old Yesterday, 02:45 PM
Leviathon Leviathon is offline

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Quote:
Originally Posted by Ruinshin View Post
How bad is the configuration? Can the routers still be hit remotely? That could be really easy or really not.

I'm going to guess not.
No idea as I don't handle routers in my department and they were still working out what to do when I left for the weekend.
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