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Old 04-01-2014, 01:19 PM
Insane Guy of Doom Insane Guy of Doom is online now

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Default Next WoW Novel: Yrel, Heart of Draenor

As covered at BlizzPlanet! Some exciting news the NDA has finally worn off on to reveal all you guys!

Quote:
Originally Posted by BlizzPlanet
I’ve been waiting quite a while for the NDA to wear off on this. I am proud to announce, in a BlizzPlanet Exclusive, the next World of Warcraft novel, World of Warcraft: Yrel: Heart of Draenor! Just as World of Warcraft: Vol’jin: Shadows of the Horde had a writer new the Warcraft franchise behind it, so will Heart of Dreanor: the famous Tara Gilesbie!



In the press details I was given by Micky Neilson, Lead Story Developer for Blizzard Entertainment, he explained this novel will bridge the gap between Mists of Pandaria and Warlords of Draenor by giving readers a look into one of the expansion’s lead characters, Yrel. The story will chronicle Yrel’s journey from a simple priestess at Karabor, to her witnessing the formation of the Iron Horde, ultimately leading to her first encounter with the player character (done similarly in Jaina Proudmoore: Tides of War).

“We are incredibly excited to be working with Ms. Gilesbie,” Micky said in regards to the upcoming novel. He also mentioned we may be seeing a forbidden romance in Yrel’s adventures which will heavily affect her role in Warlords of Draenor. He also clarified that, following another of Shadow of the Horde‘s traditions, Heart of Draenor will be a darker and more mature fare than most Warcraft novels. Due to this, I’ve had to censor the excerpt provided later on in the article slightly for the BlizzPlanet readership.

“We’ve seen how massively popular the pairing of Jaina and Kalecgos was in Tides of War, and Thrall and Aggra presented in-game is still considered one of our best works here at Blizzard. So it was natural to have another unique and well written romance. I wont’ say who catches Yrel’s eye, but I’ll give you a hint: his dad’s the leader of the Iron Horde.”

Just imagine the conflict that’s going to come from that! It looks like Yrel won’t just be Warcraft’s Joan of Arc, but perhaps their Romeo and Julliet as well?

As for our newest Warcraft author, Tara Gilesbie is a world renowned writer who, like many in today’s age, got her start on the internet. She is best known for her novella My Immortal, a Rosencrantz and Guildenstern are Dead-style take on the popular Harry Potter series of books; which chronicles Harry’s adventures through the eyes of a mentally challenged vampire student attending Hogwarts. Originally published for free, the full work can be read here if you want to get a taste of Gilesbie’s unique writing style before Heart of Draenor is out.

While I could not reach Tara herself, I was given this quote from her: “I m sooooo eksited to work on dis story! Fangz (geddit becuz Im Goffik) Blizzurd for givin me the change to work with u guys1″

I was also given a very short excerpt from Yrel: Heart of Draenor, detailing a scene between Yrel and her forbidden lover. As this is a spoiler, I’ll leave it under the read-more.

Again, I must mention that Yrel: Heart of Draenor is being written for a more mature audience and as such I’ve had to censor this expert slightly so it can remain BlizzPlanet appropriate. Unlike previous Warcraft novels, Heart of Draenor appears to be written in first person, from Yrel’s point of view.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Tara Gilesbie
Garrosh leaned in extra-close and I looked into his gothic red eyes (he was wearing color contacts) which revealed so much depressing sorrow and evilness and then suddenly I didn’t feel mad anymore.

And then…………… suddenly just as I Garrosh kissed me passionately. Garrosh climbed on top of me and we started to make out keenly against a tree. He took of my top and I took of his clothes. I even took of my bra. Then he put his thingie into my you-know-what and we did it for the first time.

“Oh! Oh! Oh! ” I screamed. (SENTENCE WAS REMOVED HERE) We started to kiss everywhere and my pale body became all warm. And then….

“WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING YOU MOTHER(CENSORED)!”

It was…………………………………………………….Velen!
World of Warcraft: Yrel: Heart of Draenor is expected to be released this fall in hardcover, audiobook, and kindle editions.
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Old 04-01-2014, 01:27 PM
Nazja Nazja is offline

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Not entirely consistent with the more recent covers. Are we sure this is genuine?
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Old 04-01-2014, 01:27 PM
Insane Guy of Doom Insane Guy of Doom is online now

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Originally Posted by Nazja View Post
Not entirely consistent with the more recent covers. Are we sure this is genuine?
Read the article below it.
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Old 04-01-2014, 01:29 PM
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Originally Posted by Insane Guy of Doom View Post
Read the article below it.
Well played.
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Old 04-01-2014, 01:34 PM
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You know I was literally about to send Micky an angry email about not telling me about the upcoming book before I remembered who Tara Gillespie was.



7/10 moderately effective troll.
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Old 04-01-2014, 01:35 PM
Insane Guy of Doom Insane Guy of Doom is online now

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Originally Posted by Omacron View Post
You know I was literally about to send Micky an angry email about not telling me about the upcoming book before I remembered who Tara Gillespie was.



7/10 moderately effective troll.
Happy April Fool's Day!

Seriously though is no one reading the actual article? It's a, funnier than the cover, and b, the excerpt is even a copy of My Immortal's most infamous scene with Warcraft character names.
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Old 04-01-2014, 01:41 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Insane Guy of Doom View Post
Happy April Fool's Day!

Seriously though is no one reading the actual article? It's a, funnier than the cover, and b, the excerpt is even a copy of My Immortal's most infamous scene with Warcraft character names.
I didn't expect it from you.
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Old 04-01-2014, 01:51 PM
Noitora Noitora is offline

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It was actually believable until the end. Felt like you tried too hard. Should've gone with more subtlety imo.
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Old 04-01-2014, 01:53 PM
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Originally Posted by Noitora View Post
It was actually believable until the end. Felt like you tried too hard. Should've gone with more subtlety imo.
I wanted to make sure people would know its a joke, like the female draenei article's text making it clear when the picture doesn't.
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Old 04-01-2014, 01:59 PM
neoshadow neoshadow is offline

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saw the title, immediately knew it was april fools.

what is it with april fools today and just being stuff we want but dragged through the slop?
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Old 04-01-2014, 02:35 PM
SmokeBlader SmokeBlader is offline

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Oh man this sounded too good to be true.
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Old 04-01-2014, 08:49 PM
Insane Guy of Doom Insane Guy of Doom is online now

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Eee! Look what my Yrel joke has wrought!

Quote:
Originally Posted by Twitter
Medievaldragon ‏@Blizzplanetcom 1h
@MickyNeilson @TheRedShirtGuy The author no doubt is all-wrong for giggles. Maybe a Yrel short story not too far-fetched? @loreology

Micky Neilson ‏@MickyNeilson 1m
@Blizzplanetcom @TheRedShirtGuy @Loreology We do have a great idea for one.
Sean also favorited my "I second the Yrel short story idea" tweet.
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Old 04-01-2014, 10:34 PM
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I fell for it.

Curse youuu BlizzPlanet and ISoG!

Good idea on the Yrel short-story, though.
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Old 04-02-2014, 12:52 AM
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Yrel should actually teach Garrosh the meaning of love. Theirs is a fan pairing done right.
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Old 04-02-2014, 06:52 AM
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Wow they -really- had me going up until I got to the part about the author. I don't know if that means the joke was that good or if Blizzard's writing had gotten -that- bad.
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Old 04-02-2014, 07:19 AM
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I was already laughing when it said it was going to focus on a Draenei character.
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Old 04-02-2014, 07:24 AM
BaronGrackle BaronGrackle is offline

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I totally thought this was real until I read the "quote" from Tara Gillespie. Then my entire physical house exhaled in relief.
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Old 04-02-2014, 07:30 AM
Mark_Romaneck Mark_Romaneck is offline

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Quote:
Originally Posted by Drusus View Post
I was already laughing when it said it was going to focus on a Draenei character.
Not gonna lie, that made me laugh out loud
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Old 04-02-2014, 08:20 AM
BaronGrackle BaronGrackle is offline

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Well the beginning compared it to Vol'jin: Shadows of the Horde. So I was ready to joke about Yrel replacing Varian/Anduin as faction leader, and I was going to say how grateful I was.
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Old 04-02-2014, 08:49 AM
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I was already laughing when it said it was going to focus on a Draenei character.
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Old 04-02-2014, 09:52 AM
Insane Guy of Doom Insane Guy of Doom is online now

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Come on, you guys believed the Yrel/Garrosh "we love how our previous Jaina Kalecgos and Thrall/Aggra romances were received by the playerbase"? That was supposed to be the first big clue in that's its a joke. You're all more pessimistic than I would have guessed.

Of course those who are aware of who Tara Gilesbie is would notice from the very title.
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Old 04-02-2014, 10:19 AM
Nazja Nazja is offline

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I have the excuse that I thought you had been fooled.
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Old 04-02-2014, 10:20 AM
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Originally Posted by Insane Guy of Doom View Post
Come on, you guys believed the Yrel/Garrosh "we love how our previous Jaina Kalecgos and Thrall/Aggra romances were received by the playerbase"? That was supposed to be the first big clue in that's its a joke. You're all more pessimistic than I would have guessed.

Of course those who are aware of who Tara Gilesbie is would notice from the very title.
Yeah I was thinking at first, because of the date, "surely April Fool's"? But I rolled with it.

But when I got to the Thrall/Aggra in-game being one of the things they were proud of, I lol'd hard and knew I was being trolled.

10/10
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Old 04-02-2014, 11:02 AM
Ashendant Ashendant is offline

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Quote:
Originally Posted by Insane Guy of Doom View Post
Come on, you guys believed the Yrel/Garrosh "we love how our previous Jaina Kalecgos and Thrall/Aggra romances were received by the playerbase"? That was supposed to be the first big clue in that's its a joke. You're all more pessimistic than I would have guessed.

Of course those who are aware of who Tara Gilesbie is would notice from the very title.
Quote:
"I ran out of the room and into the Forbidden Forest where I had lost my virility to Draco"
Quote:
"'ABRA KEDAVRA!' Vampire yelled pointing his womb."
Jesus this page is hilarious

EDIT:
Quote:
Voldemort knowing about Ebony and Draco's relationship thanks to "telekinesis."
Whatever allowed Enoby and B'loody Mary to talk to each other in silence whilst watching Das niteMARE b4 xmas.
Quote:
It turns out that Darkness, Diabolo, Crab and Goyle's dad was a vampire. He committed suicide by slitting his wrists with a razor. He had raped them and stuff before too. They all got so depressed that they became goffik and converted to Stanism.
HAHAHA

EDIT2:
Quote:
"He didn't have a nose (basically like Voldemort in the movie) and he was wearing all black but it was obvious he wasn't gothic. It was...... Voldemort!"
Quote:
Tara refuses to refer to her- er, Ebony's as anything other than "my you-know-what" or "my thingie", but does not skimp on introducing anal sex, rape, anal rape, torture, etc.
BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

EDIT3:
Quote:
That Came Out Wrong: "Draco and I came. It was.......Vlodemort and da Death Deelers!" .....Okay, either the reveal was really exciting (it wasn't) or those two really need to stop having sex at the first chance. It's seriously getting out of hand. Too bad she didn't learn the first time she did it and kept on using "X came" lines. Her spelling doesn't help:
"Hargird kept shooting at us to back 2 Hogwarts."
""Oh he's bein a fucking bastard. He told me he wouldn't ." Vampire said shaking his hed. "U wanna with me? 2 the concert?""
Quote:
Yaoi Fangirl: Tara interrupts the narrative several times to mention how hot gay/bi men are. Oddly, she insults her reviewers by calling them "gay fags" in the author's notes. And after Evony finds out that Draco has slept with Vampire, she thinks he must have AIDs!
*Dies laughing*
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Old 04-02-2014, 11:41 AM
BaronGrackle BaronGrackle is offline

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Quote:
Originally Posted by Insane Guy of Doom View Post
Come on, you guys believed the Yrel/Garrosh "we love how our previous Jaina Kalecgos and Thrall/Aggra romances were received by the playerbase"? That was supposed to be the first big clue in that's its a joke. You're all more pessimistic than I would have guessed.
You said, and I quote:

Quote:
We’ve seen how massively popular the pairing of Jaina and Kalecgos was in Tides of War, and Thrall and Aggra presented in-game is still considered one of our best works here at Blizzard.
There was a low-level bit of fan fun and revelry at Jaina with her dragon wang. I remember. That's enough for Blizzard to call it "massively popular".

I also noticed that the phrase "massively popular" was NOT used to describe Thrall-Aggra. That's Blizzardspeak for "We know fans don't like this, but we're already committed so we're going to pretend like it's an asset."
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