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  #1  
Old 01-16-2014, 04:20 PM
C9H20 C9H20 is offline

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Default Funny Hearthstone Quotes

You might not play HS so you don't know, but Blizz is at it again. No flavor lore in minion descriptions, it is a non-stop joke fest like the good ol' WCIII pissed sounds. Other HS players, post your favorites.

Anyway let me start it off:




Alexstrasza the Life-Binder brings life and hope to everyone. Except Deathwing. And Malygos. And Nekros.





He's a legend among murlocs. "Mrghllghghllghg!", they say.




Lorewalker Cho archives and shares tales from the land of Pandaria, but his favorite story is the one where Joey and Phoebe go on a road trip.


Last but not the least:



In the jungle, the mighty jungle, the lion gets slowly consumed by hyenas.


EDIT, one more before I go to sleep:



The Frostwolves are locked in combat with the Stormpike Expedition over control of Alterac Valley. Every attempt at peace-talks has ended with Captain Galvangar killing the mediator.

Last edited by C9H20; 01-16-2014 at 04:46 PM..
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  #2  
Old 01-16-2014, 05:14 PM
BaronGrackle BaronGrackle is offline

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That's brilliant. I don't play, so please post more!
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  #3  
Old 01-16-2014, 10:23 PM
Reignac Reignac is offline

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"Baron Geddon was Ragnaros's foremost lieutenant, until he got FIRED."

"Cairne was killed by Garrosh, so... don't put this guy in a Warrior deck. It's pretty insensitive."

"Westfall is full of dust devils. And buzzards. And crazed golems. And pirates. Why does anyone live here?"
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Originally Posted by Reignac View Post
You know, when I put the "i hate all of you" tag in threads, I'm not trying to be funny or cute. With a handful of exceptions, I really do hate almost everybody here.

It's one thing to have problems and voice your concerns, but when you endlessly bitch day in and day out about the same tired old shit, it honestly makes me wonder why you are even here. Generally when somebody doesn't like something, they stop caring about it.

And on that note, SoL is a forum I no longer enjoy. So, I'm done here. And I genuinely think the people who have absolutely nothing at all positive to say about the game and, the people whose posts are composed entirely of whining, really consider leaving (or at least sticking to non-WoW sections). Because if you truly get no enjoyment out of WoW, then why are you here?

With that said, goodbye.
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  #4  
Old 01-16-2014, 10:37 PM
Malygos Malygos is offline

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Originally Posted by C9H20 View Post



Alexstrasza the Life-Binder brings life and hope to everyone. Except Deathwing. And Malygos. And Nekros.
What a hater.
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  #5  
Old 01-16-2014, 11:02 PM
Millenia Millenia is offline

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Originally Posted by Reignac View Post

"Cairne was killed by Garrosh, so... don't put this guy in a Warrior deck. It's pretty insensitive."
I think Genesis has a sympathizer among the Hearthstone team.
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The Alliance's three rules on faction conflict:
1) You can't win.
2) You can't break even.
3) You can't leave the game.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Mustrum View Post
Because if a storyteller is doing his job, he makes you care. And if that storyteller then says "I dunno, then they stopped fighting, I guess," without any explanation or clarification, his audience has every right to be pissed off. Because they were given reason to stay interested, reason to keep up with his tale, only to be shut down just as things were getting good. A waste of time, a waste of emotional tension, a waste, if you fail to grasp the significance of narrative, of money.
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  #6  
Old 01-17-2014, 04:33 AM
C9H20 C9H20 is offline

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Originally Posted by BaronGrackle View Post
That's brilliant. I don't play, so please post more!
Glad you like it, and the words of encouragement are welcome if for no other reason than preventing me from double posting




Young Night Elves love to play "Who can get the Ancient of War to Uproot?" You lose if you get crushed to death.

I guess it explains why NEs never got a big population in spite of being immortal.


Of course, Blizz wouldn't be Blizz without pop-culture references:



Do you know the first rule of Brawl Club?




If you miss, it leaves a lightning-bolt-shaped scar on your target.


And the puns, oh God the puns:



I wouldn't say I LOVE knives, but I'm definitely a fan.




This spell can be very Entertaining.




Nothing beats rock.




He just wants people to see his vacation photos.




"I solemnly swear to uphold the Light, purge the world of darkness, and to eat only burritos." - The Argent Dawn Oath




"What is a better weapon? The sharp one your enemies expect, or the blunt one they ignore?" - The Art of Warrior, Chapter 9

Note: it is a warrior exclusive spell so...




"I'm going to need you to come in on Sunday." - Cruel Taskmaster


@Mili, I don't follow?
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  #7  
Old 01-17-2014, 06:47 AM
Hammerbrew Hammerbrew is offline

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"Every attempt at peace-talks has ended with Captain Galvangar killing the mediator."

"Alexstrasza the Life-Binder brings life and hope to everyone. Except Deathwing. And Malygos. And Nekros."

Oh Jesus, I laughed heartily.
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  #8  
Old 01-17-2014, 08:02 AM
Odok Odok is offline

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Spawn of the Light? Or Pawn of the Lights?
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Head Canon: The Deathwing Gambit

Quote:
Originally Posted by Lowtide View Post
For playing a fantasy game, some of you have a really withered imagination.
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  #9  
Old 01-17-2014, 08:13 AM
Hammerbrew Hammerbrew is offline

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Spawn of the Light? Or Pawn of the Lights?


Hallowed are the Ori.
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  #10  
Old 01-17-2014, 09:25 AM
C9H20 C9H20 is offline

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Hogger is super powerful. If you kill him, it's because he let you




The Argent Dawn stands vigilant against the Scourge, as well as people who cut in line at coffee shops.




If she threatens to "moon" you, it's not what you think.




Pirates are into this new fad called "Planking".


Here is one for the worgen fans, from Blizzard:



If you want to stop a worgen from infiltrating, just yell, "No! Bad boy!"




Yes, he's a demigod. No, he doesn't need to wear a shirt.




These guys just show up and start Keeping your Groves without even asking.




Druids take nourishment from many things: the power of nature, the songbird's chirp, a chocolate cake.




"Reforestation" is suddenly a terrifying word.


And here are some funny ones for WoW players:



"Cast Moonfire, and never stop." - How to Be a Druid, Chapter 5, Section 3




Some druids still have flashbacks from strangers yelling "Innervate me!!" at them.


EDIT:

Quote:
Originally Posted by Hammerbrew View Post
<VID>

Hallowed are the Ori.


Often followed by Holy Smokes!

Last edited by C9H20; 01-17-2014 at 09:29 AM..
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  #11  
Old 01-17-2014, 12:06 PM
Reignac Reignac is offline

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Quote:
Originally Posted by C9H20 View Post
"Cast Moonfire, and never stop." - How to Be a Druid, Chapter 5, Section 3
yup
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Reignac View Post
You know, when I put the "i hate all of you" tag in threads, I'm not trying to be funny or cute. With a handful of exceptions, I really do hate almost everybody here.

It's one thing to have problems and voice your concerns, but when you endlessly bitch day in and day out about the same tired old shit, it honestly makes me wonder why you are even here. Generally when somebody doesn't like something, they stop caring about it.

And on that note, SoL is a forum I no longer enjoy. So, I'm done here. And I genuinely think the people who have absolutely nothing at all positive to say about the game and, the people whose posts are composed entirely of whining, really consider leaving (or at least sticking to non-WoW sections). Because if you truly get no enjoyment out of WoW, then why are you here?

With that said, goodbye.
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  #12  
Old 01-17-2014, 12:15 PM
Ruinshin Ruinshin is offline

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Quote:

"Reforestation" is suddenly a terrifying word.
lol.

Quote:
If she threatens to "moon" you, it's not what you think.
Ehh, I'ma risk it.



Quote:
Young Night Elves love to play "Who can get the Ancient of War to Uproot?" You lose if you get crushed to death.
Shame this isn't canon.


Quote:
Druids take nourishment from many things: the power of nature, the songbird's chirp, a chocolate cake.
It should have really been waffles and not chocolate cake.. Waffles were an iconic Druid thing.
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Fucking Epic :X
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  #13  
Old 01-18-2014, 11:55 AM
Millenia Millenia is offline

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Quote:
Originally Posted by C9H20 View Post
@Mili, I don't follow?
Genesis has occasionally said that Cairne, Baine, and Dezco are pretty much clones of each other.

The Cairne card summons up a Baine card that is only ever relevant when Cairne dies. The Baine card also has the exact same stats at Cairne. Essentially, Cairne clones himself when he dies.
__________________
"All right, I'll get that kid to eat. Where's my screw driver and my plumber's helper? I'll open up his mouth and I'll shove it in."


The Alliance's three rules on faction conflict:
1) You can't win.
2) You can't break even.
3) You can't leave the game.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Mustrum View Post
Because if a storyteller is doing his job, he makes you care. And if that storyteller then says "I dunno, then they stopped fighting, I guess," without any explanation or clarification, his audience has every right to be pissed off. Because they were given reason to stay interested, reason to keep up with his tale, only to be shut down just as things were getting good. A waste of time, a waste of emotional tension, a waste, if you fail to grasp the significance of narrative, of money.
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  #14  
Old 10-09-2014, 02:12 AM
BaronGrackle BaronGrackle is offline

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So where in the game is this flavor text? I don't see it when I hover over cards.
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  #15  
Old 10-09-2014, 02:30 AM
Lord Grimtale Lord Grimtale is offline

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Quote:
Originally Posted by C9H20 View Post
Here is one for the worgen fans, from Blizzard:



If you want to stop a worgen from infiltrating, just yell, "No! Bad boy!"
That's pretty much one of my most favorite Worgen artworks, it truly encapsulates how a Worgen Rogue would look stalking the rooftops of his homeland.

He sounds really awesome when you play him too, though I think it's the same guy that voiced Garrosh since it sounds a lot like him.

I love how "First kill!" and "I smell blood!" sound so intimidating.

http://www.hearthhead.com/card=994/worgen-infiltrator

I think the TCG art for Worgen never disappointed me though, they were all pretty well done.
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  #16  
Old 10-09-2014, 02:57 AM
Quaero Quaero is offline

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Quote:
Originally Posted by BaronGrackle View Post
So where in the game is this flavor text? I don't see it when I hover over cards.
It's in the card crafting menu.
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  #17  
Old 10-09-2014, 09:44 AM
Frostshock! Frostshock! is offline

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Quote:
Originally Posted by BaronGrackle View Post
So where in the game is this flavor text? I don't see it when I hover over cards.
Go to your collection and right click on a card.
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